The Kelpies, Scotland

© Mark Mutch O'Hare

© Mark Mutch O’Hare

What can I say about these magical beasts that hasn’t already been said. Nothing really, they are what they are, a master piece, outstanding engineering as well as art. Totally mesmerizing, if not enchanting. You can’t help the pride making the hairs on your neck stand to attention when you are hypnotised by their status, standing boldly towering 30 metres on the Scottish landscape in central Scotland. Falkirk to be more precise, The Kelpies, Scotland.

© Mark Mutch O'Hare The Kelpies

© Mark Mutch O’Hare The Kelpies

By Road
Follow the yellow AA signs or brown heritage signs.

  • From Edinburgh – take the M9 towards Stirling, exit at Junction 5 for Falkirk/Grangemouth and then follow the brown tourism signs to `Helix park and Kelpies`
  • From Glasgow – take the M80 towards Stirling, exit at Junction 8 for M876 and join M9, exit at Junction 6 for Falkirk/Grangemouth and then follow the brown tourism signs to `Helix park and Kelpies`
  • From Carlisle and the South – M74, M73, M80, M876, M9, and follow the signs for Falkirk as above.
  • From Perth and the North – A9, M9 towards Edinburgh, exit at Junction 6 for Falkirk as above.

Andy Scott

Glasgow’s Andy Scott is the artist responsible for the Kelpies, a sculpture of colossal Clydesdale horse heads that tower 30 metres over Helix Park, Falkirk, near the M9 motorway. Personally
I love his work, check him out if you can.

I love the whole Helix park development, and if you haven’t been, I urge you to go, it’s smashing.

Photographed to Death

Okay, now I have got some of my admiration out the way, time to tell it how it is. I simply dread going into all the Scottish forum Facebook pages, because these babes have been photographed to utter death, to the extent that at times I cringe looking at them, it’s no ones fault by the way, why shouldn’t people snap them, its one of the reasons they were built, tourists take photos, and shit loads of them as well. So do I. My problem, or irrational, illogical contradictory, pointless issue is that they all take the same fecking photo and post them. Okay I get it, not everyone is a professional photographer, and well,  people just come to get the shot they saw on the Facebook forum on the first place. (Yip, I shall shut my mouth…..erm…well naw, I won’t. 🙂

There is so much more to the Kelpies than the standard smart phone photo, they are simply attractions that need to be added to the bucket list, (which will of course result in more pictures creating digital noise on Scottish Facebook forums) I will just have to deal with it 🙂 .

I have had a few visits to the  Kelpies, Scotland, and I genially got Forth Road Bridge photo fear the second time, (Forth Road Bridge photo fear is the same as my contradiction blog on the Kelpies,, if you’re not looking at the Kelpies in Facebook forums, you are defo looking at the Forth Road Bridge, it’s almost like they are the only 2 things in Scotland people want to photograph, okay that is a lie there is also Dunnottar castle and Urquhart castle as well, and if the tourists get really bored they throw in Edinburgh castle just to make us Scots twitch. Then there is that mirror man in the loch as well at Loch Earn at St Fillans)

I have now come to relies that I am moaning about tourists and enthusiasts taking pictures, of land marks. Like is that not what is supposed to happen?… of course it is, just completely ignore everything I just moaned at there as I was only joking,  leading the sanctimonious fools who have problems with people posting photos of Scottish land marks in Scottish pages on Facebook, you get my point. If you don’t let me simplify it for the Facebook warriors who feel it necessary to post stupid silly comments in a Scotland wide/worldwide Facebook forum such as “oh no, not another picture of the Kelpies, or the Castle”… see these people, they need a good clip round the Ear, what the hell else are you going to post in world wide forums highlighting Scotland’s beauty and treasures, pictures of your bloody dinner!!!..IT IS PAGES dedicated to Scotland YOU silly silly people!!! and all things in it, deal with it, more than one photo of the same appreciated landmark is allowed, and if you can’t “hawd yir weeshed”, then piss off to a forum entitled, “I’m going to moan about people doing social media stuff on social media pages” PAGE…. if you read this blog, and are associated with any pages on Facebook that house such ignorant self empty zoomers, post the reply “Oh no, not another comment from a choob, saying oh no not another photo of a Scottish landmark, on a Scottish page”. If you are one of the sheep who wait for the bait, to post such comments under peoples photos, not only are you demonstrating your complete lack of class, and ability to human, but it’s best you immediately go straight to the utensil drawer in your kitchen, take out the cheese grater and rub it over your eyes, once you return to the world of social media everything will look different, even peoples photos of the Kelpies, then you can relax a little, and resume life from chapter one, if you have nothing nice to say or constructive, then WHHHEEESSSHHHED!!!.  Peace xxx


Anyway, I decided that I needed to snap the Kelpies, the way the tourists, enthusiasts and professionals do, but also in my style, a different take on them, maybe verging on street style,who even knows?, who is even reading this now?, shut up Mark and get the pictures out…OKAY !! here is my take on these amazing sculptures, hope you enjoy…. seriously just ignore me and the Facebook warriors, keep snapping peeps and keep posting, it’s good for Scotland, and your soul 🙂 The Kelpies, Scotland.